to THAILAND we go...

So I leave from my Colorado home tomorrow at 4:30 to head to the airport and to fly out to the Land of Smiles. I am honestly SO pumped. I keep being asked if I'm nervous... my answer, not really. Any bit of nervousness has been completely overrun by my excitedness. God is going to CONTINUE to rock my face off, I have no doubt.

I know I'll be stretched and taught even more than I can even expect or that has already happened... which seems crazy to me. But I know God is a incomprehendable guy, and I get more excited about Him everyday. I love that I find myself learned something NEW about Him every single day. How sweet is HE?!

Keep my team in your prayers. I'll be sure to update you all whenever I get the chance.
Love and Blessings to each of you.
and... MERRY CHRISTMAS.

May God reveal Himself to you even a smidge more than yesterday!

OUTREACH MODE.

How in the world did I get here?

I've been molded, refined, transformed, and stretched more so than I think I ever have been in my life. God has become more real to me than I could have ever expected. I honestly can say I've loved every minute of being here in this beautiful state. Although it's undeniable that it hasn't all been easy, it's been totally worth it.
The scenery is delicious. The teachings have touched my heart. The people here are as close as family. God has shown up again and again and continued to transform my heart. I cry more often than I ever have. I could blame it on the estrogen, but I'm fairly positive that it's so much more than that. My heart has melted and I feel like it could just burst at any moment. It's THAT full.

Next step- sayinggoodbyetooverhalfoftheseamazingpeople-notsogood.

BUT the step after will make it all worth it.

Team Thailand is off to Kansas for a couple days to work with a couple different organizations. Service projects, sharing our dramas, basically just helping the hurting and sharing God's love in many different ways. I really look forward to it.
Then we come back to Colorado to fly out to THAILAND. Can you believe it? I hardly can.

We're going to be in a village for the first bit. We're going to be doing some ESL, little camps for the children, working.... all day/errrday. AND bathing in the river. I'm so stoked. After that we're headed to the "Tree of Life Children's Home." I absolutely cannot wait to pour into these children's lives. I want to share with them the love my Heavenly Father has poured out so abundantly in my life. Then we head to the "Abba House Recovery Center." We'll be working with several different age groups: Ex-prostitutes, hurt children, young boys, etc.

I really can't even begin to tell you all what I believe this trip in going to do for me. I have no doubt I'll be stretched more so than I expect. I'll shower less and wear the same clothes over again. I'll cry more than I'm comfortable with. God will pour out His strength more so than I could ever imagine. And so much more.
Whatever He wants to do, I'm so game.
I'm as "ready" as I can be.
And more importantly I KNOW God is going to give my team every ounce of strength that we need. Praise the Lord, right?!

He is forever faithful. His mercies are new every morning. I choose to pick up my cross DAILY and follow Him wherever He decides to lead me.

Thank you all for your prayer and support. I really can't even begin to express the gratitude I have for all of that. It has meant so much! Continued prayer would also be MUCH appreciated!
You [all are] da bayyyst.

Farewell for now.
Blessings!

11 down.// 1 to go.

You heard me. Craziness...
I've officially been in colorful Colorado for 11 wonderful weeks. (clever, right?)
Leaving me with ONE left.
How am I feeling about it?
I can't even think about it... Like, don't misunderstand here- I'm pumpppped for Thailand. Seriously- thrilled, ecstatic, leaping for joy. BUT I can't think about our group splitting up. 17 on team Thailand, 20 on DR/Haiti, and 5 to Brazil.

I never, ever... (for those of you who talked to me before I came can vouch for me on this one) thought I'd make as good as friends as I have. These people are hands-down my second family.
 I can't believe how different I feel either. It's so crazy. God has totally transformed me and I know He's still doing work in me. Praise the Lord! HA.

Like really, I'm learning so much. Life lessons, SO much about my Lord, my thought pattern is changing, attitude about a lot of things, so on and so forth.
What's been the teach these past couple weeks? hmmm. Let's see, I went home for a short little Thanksgiving break (which was SO nice to get to spend time with the fam and see some of my friends. real good.) Reunited with my Colorado after the weekend, only to JUMP back into the normal busy schedule of classes and such.

We've had weeks of lessons on Lifestyle of Repentance, Missions, and the Holy Spirit.
ALL of which have been... you guessed it, SO GOOD. I now have PAGES upon PAGES of notes which will take me MONTHS of Quiet Times and stuff to go through as thoroughly as I'd like, but I'm so excited about it.

Yesterday was our "Love Feast." aka: Our Christmas dinner/ big event. It was SERIOUSLY one of the best nights here. SO fun. Each room gave an "offering" plus some individuals threw in some extra acts. It was hilarious and so so incredible. They also gave out "superlative" awards... I am thrilled to share that I got the "Esther Award-- for being a woman of influence." I just wanted to cry. HA (yes, I'm more of a softy now..) Pictures WILL be posted on the big FB soon.

This week is Director's Choice, and I have no idea what that means. A WHOLE lot of packing and cleaning things up. Something just spectacular I'm sure. And it's undeniable that there is going to be some crying happening. I've just got to face facts sometime, right? I have learned that I'm better at change than I thought, but still. This is gonna be slightly difficult.
But if I've learned one thing (which, Praise the Lord that I have.... times like, a billion), I have no doubt that God is still gonna be faithful and hold me in tact. ha//

I've got a TON of pictures on Facebook. like really, I've taken OVER 700 pictures so far. It's actually a bit ridiculous.. but feel free to creep around a bit if you'd like.
which I guess in order to find this, you've already creeped a tad. GOOD. I'm happy you did!
Hope this has helped to fill [you] in a bit.

Have a blessed week, dear ones.

Flashlights.//

Jesus, Jesus
Holy and anointed One, Jesus
Jesus, Jesus
Risen and exalted One, Jesus
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/v/vineyard/holy_and_anointed_one.html ]
Your name is like honey on my lips
Your Spirit like water to my soul
Your Word is a lamp unto my feet
Jesus, I love You, I love You.


This song. 
One of those that I've probably heard over a 100 times... but it meant so much more this morning.
Especially the "Your Word is a lamp unto my feet" line.
In worship this morning I got an odd picture of this. Our feet were actually flashlights. 
(good luck walking, right? but that's beside the point...) 
We were on this dark path, walking easily with our flashlight feet, and that is what was lighting our way. 
God just spoke to me through that. 


How silly is it that we often try to walk with the light off? Or to put it in "real words"... God has given us His word to help us along in our life. Why do we (me definitely included) think that we don't need to really get into His word to walk straighter? 
crazy idea, right?
If someone were to give us tools to build a house, would we be so ignorant as to try to build without them? Or if we were given a car to drive, would we still say, "No thanks, I'd rather walk to the store that's a hundred miles away..."
stupid.


God has given us His word to help us.
It seriously has all the answers.
It was NOT just written for people that were alive when it was written.
IT'S FOR NOW.


Am I making the most of that? 
Am I really digging in? 
Am I trying to solve my own problems or am I looking to God and His Word to help guide me?


Are you?


Sidenote: I, of course, googled "flashlight feet" for a visual and "oddly enough" there were no images found. There are flashlight shoes though. 
So here's a visual for added....something:

and for you ladies:

Over Half.

I can't even comprehend that.
I'm over half-way through my wonderful YWAM experience.. Yesterday I paid the rest of my outreach fee and told my dad that I now feel super poor. His question to me was, "well would you still trade this experience for the money you've had to pay?"
Absolutely.
No doubt about it.
Don't regret it a single bit.
SO worth it.

It's been just amazing. God is continuing to use in AND out of class times to teach and challenge me on a TON of different things. Seriously, a ton.
I'm learning so much about myself, so much about people, and most importantly, so much about my Jesus. My relationship with Him is different than it's ever been, and so much more rewarding. I actually hear from him, which I thought at first was out of my reach. He speaks to me. Not audibly YET, but through His Word, through my friends here, and just giving me words and direction. It's been just super.

Last week was Spiritual Warfare week.
WOAH.
We had the Musicians DTS from the main base come and stay with us here up the mountain. So I had 12 girls in my room total. Twelve. So it was an intense, crowded week. But still enjoyable and filled with really good teachings and such. And I didn't fail to take an excessive amount of notes. Excessive. Basically the devil is just out to destroy relationships. He thrives on disunity.
THRIVES.
What power are we giving him? He can only take control as much as we let him.

This week is "Outreach Prep" week. Basically means that we are learning our dramas and such. I just finished learning the first one I'm in, "Facade." It's so sweet. I got thrown around a little in a fight (with a rug-burn to prove it) but it's a really powerful drama, or at least I think so. I'm in one other one and then "Puppets" which should be interesting. I have more time off this week, which I am grateful for. I could use some more down time. Although I, of course, want to be involved in more dramas because they are SICK. So good and so powerful!

Next week I have a half week and then I'm Delaware bound for a couple days. I am so stoked for that! I really can't wait to see my family and friends.
Woot-Woot.
really though, all my Delaware friends: please get up with me. You might have to come see me since I want to spend a LOT of time with my family. But still, I'd love to see you!

My heart is gonna explode here soon.

If I had only one sentence of an update available, it'd be this:
God is rocking my face off.

I feel like SO MUCH is happening that I'm having trouble organizing my thoughts... seriously. I keep wanting to ask what day it is. I haven't even really started being able to process everything that is being thrown at me. but it's alllll good. I'm still trying to, as best as I can, to soak it all up.

oh Jesus, help me.

I think I mentioned already that last week was relationships. So, of course, that gave me lots to think about. This week has been "The Person of Jesus", with the staff doing the teachings and woah, there is such an awesome, God-filled staff here. They are bringing it!
I find myself being continually challenged and wanting more and more of Jesus.

Pour it out, Lord.


What's new here? hmm. God is just lighting a fire inside me, making His Word come alive to me, and revealing Himself more and more.
Incredible.
and I'm loving it.


Outreach update: I'm headed to Thailand on Christmas Eve.
(Mom, I'll forward you the "itinerary")
and am SO stoked. Like, I can't even begin to explain.
I spent some time "learning" Thai phrases this morning. oh boy, it's going to be SUPER interesting. But, BRING IT ON.
Word of the day: สวัสดี
also known as: sa-wat-dee or in English, hello.
super fun, right?
yes, honey.

Happy One Month, Colorado.

If we're being honest here, I'm just going to throw this out there.
One of the best months I've ever had.
(and parents, please don't take that offensively at all.)

I am truly in love.
-in love with my Jesus.
-in love with the mountains.
-in love with my God.
-in love with the people here.
-in love with my Heavenly Father.
-in love with the rich teachings.
-in love with my Jesus.... whoops, you get the point.

Basically, I'm STILL having a super awesome time here.
Trying, as best as I can, just to soak it up.
I'm exhausted pretty much every morning but God just provides the energy or whatever I need for the day. Emotionally though, woah.
God is just working and transforming me.

Last week was Father Heart of God and sunny weather
This week is Relationships and SNOW.
BRING IT ON.
Just pray that I am able to soak everything in and God CONTINUES to wreck and mold me.

woah now.

This has been quiiiiite the week for me.
Ha. what am I saying? EVERY week here has been "quite the week."

We spent Monday through Wednesday at the Colorado Springs base. We had to leave at 6... so it was an early morning for all of us. And I, of course, was not that excited for it. I packed up Sunday night (not so great attitude included) and was dragging Monday through the first session. Then, BOOOOOM. God turned that WAY around. Totally, totally changed my attitude and mind about a lot of things. From now and then, I FEEEEEL different.

Praise and Worship, SO GOOD.
Small group times, EXCELLENT.
Small Bible studies, MIND BLOWING.
Speakers, challenging like WOAH.
Broke all kinds of chains, INCRED.
All around just an AWESOME time, no doubt.

I felt God's presence like I've never felt Him before.
God is good, amen? AMEN.

I'm completely blown away this week. Like I had tonight off and chose to stay home just cuz I know my limits, and I know I needed to not do anything for a night. I also have a lot of homework I need to work on, pronto. That includes reading, journaling, a creative presentation... probably something else to.

In other news, I'm excited to do laundry tomorrow. I haven't done for almost 2 weeks and I'm running SUPER low on.... necessities.

Everyday...

I'm loving Jesus//

This week has been so good. Sessions were EXCELLENT. More bonding time which, of course, is just "totes presh". SNOW. Christmas music has busted out... at least for me. Lots of adventures. It's been really good.

Friday night was "Kingdom Night" where we went to downtown Denver to do an outreach. Basically most of us just split into small groups and walked around, talking to people and praying for those that would let us. It was totally stretching for me. My group did more of a prayer/singing walk. We stopped on street corners and prayed... a lot. We walked and sang, loudly, and just really prayed without ceasing. We talked to a couple different people and got to pray with them, which was pretty dang cool.

I'm excited to continue to be stretched, continue to grow, continue loving the Lord, and continuing with all these awesome people I'm surrounded with.
God is so gooooood.

Only complaint, didn't pack enough warm clothes or enough fuzzy socks. HA! I should have known better. I have bought several warms, a good amount of food, and am thinking I'm going to have to invest in some rain boots for the snow. Oh well, so is life I suppose. :]

The Character and Nature of God.

I can't really even explain or begin to describe everything I've been challenged with this week. Pastor Blake Mattock is here to teach this week... showing us several different aspects of God's Character. What an AWESOME God I serve?! right? It's been super challenging. I was a little nervous at first beings that the sessions are LONG. BUT- they are flying by. Keeping my attention the whole time and just trying to absorb and digest everything that we're talking about.
Hmm. What else is happening here?
Still a ton of bonding. Like, praying together, talking together, games, sports, adventures, eating, worshipping together, and so on. The people here are just super. I'm LOVING it.
OH, and LOVING my small group girls and leader. Erika is the best ever, no lie.

Today, I'm feeling tired and a little sickish. But I'm trying to still focus and not get complainy. ha I'll push through.

Hope you ALL (whoever you are) to have a great day and may you FEEL God's presence and love all over!

New Beginnings//

Colorado.
Woah... I don't even know how to begin this. I was wayyyy nervous to come out here. But like an hour into the trip I was so pumped about it. I've been here exactly a week today. Totally seems like longer! This friends that I've made, the times we've had so far- spiritually, emotionally, physically, etc etc.
SUPER COOL.

Totally was our first "normal day"... It consisted of going down to the base, worship and intercession time, laundry, and then our first outreach. I was crazy tired from laundry, which seemed to take FOREVER. But then I got to outreach. It was at a women's halfway home, and I just babysat the kids for 2 hours while the mothers had class. Totally didn't expect it to be as cool as it was. I held a baby the whole time, praying for them, remembering Psalm 139. It just ended up being so much cooler then expected.

Last week was bonding week... hiking, outings, hanging out, introductions, testimonies, stretching, awesome small group times. You get the point. It was sweet.

Outreach options are Brazil, DR/Haiti, or Thailand. Sweet options, right? As of now, I'm leaning towards Thailand. I feel like God is calling me there, and I'm pumped. Still going to pray about it and such.

I'm so glad I'm here. :]